3 Ways Christian Marriage Counseling Can Help Your Relationship
Not long ago, a couple who had been happily married experienced some form of serious communication problems.
The husband claims that he cannot talk to her wife about relationship issues. The wife on the other hand believes that she gets over issues pretty fast than he does and thus communication rarely works. Their marriage was simply becoming hectic! However, it was not long before they realized that they needed a solution as soon as possible. They decided to see a marriage counselor.
When couples decide to go for therapy, no doubt, they will have a lot of questions about the whole process. Beginning couple’s therapy is never an easy task and thus requires a lot of courage and faith.
So how exactly does Christian Marriage Counseling work?
Well, despite the fact that each couple is unique, they all undergo a similar process. Here are three phases that will help you understand the process.
1. Identifying patterns
In this first stage, the therapist tries to explain to the couple that the challenges they are experiencing is as a result of some patterns between them. Literally, your therapist will help you understand the negative patterns and how they manifest in your relationship.
In the case of this couple, the husband feels unresolved and even thinks that his partner is not concerned about him or the relationship. On the other hand, the wife freezes because of his intensity and the only way she can cope is to avoid contact with him. This however does not solve anything and instead makes the husband more intense and frustrated.
Such cycles can only be resolved through counseling. Fortunately, counselors know how to go about it. In fact, a therapist would emphasize the strengths in your relationship and equip you with tips on how to nourish it.
2. Changing the underlying issues
This process entails your therapist assisting you to change the negative patterns identified in the previous step. Going back to our couple, we found out that the family teachings that they both received while growing up were different. While the husband was taught that one should not go to bed angry, the wife believed in not holding on to things. Consequently, the husband interprets her distance as a sign that she does not care about him.
Once you understand the context of your partner’s reaction, it takes a small effort and specific adjustments to make your relationship better.
3. Strengthening intimacy.
This is where your therapist will assist you in implement the changes that you have made. Remember that changes are tailored towards some particular dynamics as a couple particularly so that you can maintain them for a longer period of time. Focus on understanding each other and understand that each one of you is unique.
Back to our couple, the husband eventually understood the need to give her space to do her own things. On the other hand, the wife learned to communicate effectively with him and thus they were able to resolve their issues easily. Surely, marriage counseling played a role in strengthening their partnership.
If your marriage is full of misunderstandings and arguments, definitely you are missing something. But, where will you even start from? Well, no need to worry because Broken Arrow Marriage Counseling is all you need. Similarly, things could be getting out of hand and perhaps you are even planning for a divorce. But, hey wait. Consider Broken Arrow Marriage Counseling as an option and be sure to save your marriage.