Counseling those who counsel others – Assistance for those in Ministry roles
Counseling for Pastors in Broken Arrow – Tulsa, OK
Many people reach out to their pastor in times of need. This creates an environment where ministers often spend time away from their families so they can help others. Their role requires them to hear, sometime difficult or upsetting issues from people that they cannot always discuss with others, making them a confidant and a counselor all in one. So the question can easily be asked- who can a pastor turn to when they need someone to talk to about their personal or family struggles who will understand their values and their relationship with God?
Because of their role, it can be essential that a minister find a Christian counselor to help them work through the stresses of life. Beyond the traditional stress, there is the fact that many pastors are always on call. Traditionally, they are already on a six day workweek, and even that last day is not guaranteed off from the demands of the job. This can be an illness that required them to get to the hospital, a sudden death that requires comfort and assistance to the family with regard to a funeral, or any urgent matter they are called away on for their community. While they are out, there is often a family at home without a member for dinner, or a special event missed out. The result is a level of suffering from every member of the family.
The term “compassion fatigue” has been used for describing those who experience this overwhelming amount of interaction with those who are suffering. It can also be described as a sense of becoming numb to protect them from what they hear and see. Sadly, it is not just the minister who suffers, it can include their loved ones as well.
In the Tulsa and Broken Arrow areas, we are a Christian counseling resource for those pastors who are reaching out for care for themselves and possibly their families. It can identify all the stresses and issues for everyone involved.
The families of clergy are often held to an extremely high, and possibly unachievable standard by those in the community. At the same time they are missing out on time with their loved one while that person is out serving others. When you step back and realize we are all humans, regardless of our title or role, it becomes clear that ministers and their families face the same stresses as any family. Because of the expectations, this all takes place under scrutiny that others would not face.
When you consider the high standard placed on the entire family, often unfairly, it can result in stress for the children. The term P.K.- Pastor’s Kid is often used to highlight the spotlight that is on them. While it may not be as difficult when they are younger, as they age it can create several unpleasant scenarios. For those children eager to please, it can push them to a point of extreme stress, where they turn to addiction or develop other unhealthy scenarios to overcome the pain. In other cases, they can rebel as a way to lose the label that was placed on them, even though they have no control over their parent’s occupation.
This specialized Christian pastor counseling in Tulsa and Broken Arrow can also work to reconnect couples in their marriage, when the needs of others have been put in front of the pastor’s own spouse.
If you or your family are suffering, please reach out to us so we can begin to help everyone involved healing and get on track to a happier, healthier life. These sessions will be in a confidential setting where you can be open and honest and not fear the judgment of others who may not understand the demands of your job, or your spouse’s role.